At a young age I remember sensing a need for God. I was the oldest in a family of five children where chaos was most often the norm. Our family attended church and there began my spiritual journey. I went to Sunday school, youth programs, and summer camps. At a youth church outing while in high school, I went forward to accept Christ. This was at a Billy Graham sponsored movie, The Restless Ones.
I was one of those kids who wanted to do everything right. I needed to make God and everybody else happy and pleased with me. This faulty thinking took me down a path where seeds of perfectionism sprouted and grew. I became a "people pleaser", a control freak, extremely sensitive to the possibility of rejection, fearful, and never felt I measured up to my own standard of perfection. This led to all kinds of difficulties for me; and as children arrived on the scene, for them too! Depression was just one result as the dominoes fell.
Our patient loving God does not leave us broken. My experience has been a process of learning and internalizing the Truth of who God is and what He says about me. As I am able to replace deceptive lies of the enemy with God’s Word, I can then experience the peace and joy promised in scripture to believers. There is indeed freedom in Christ, and my desire is to make that know to others who may be chained in a pit of despair or imprisoned by feelings of worthlessness!